rjac Posted April 12, 2020 Report Share Posted April 12, 2020 What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? "Aye Maytee". Ogilthorpe, JLMoran, coneyraven and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ditchdoc Posted April 13, 2020 Report Share Posted April 13, 2020 How did the trees react to spring? They were re leaved. Ogilthorpe and Chadster 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chadster Posted April 14, 2020 Report Share Posted April 14, 2020 What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk. RWDW1204, Ogilthorpe, JLMoran and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ampurp85 Posted April 15, 2020 Report Share Posted April 15, 2020 What do packages and social media share? A post-al system What's clever and can fit in your hand? A smartphone WAAAYTOOO, Ogilthorpe, SpeedNoodles and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chadster Posted April 22, 2020 Report Share Posted April 22, 2020 rjac, Ogilthorpe, WAAAYTOOO and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted April 22, 2020 Report Share Posted April 22, 2020 On 4/13/2020 at 11:16 PM, Chadster said: What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk. What do you call a snow man in the summer? A puddle. RWDW1204, WAAAYTOOO, Ogilthorpe and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coneyraven Posted April 22, 2020 Report Share Posted April 22, 2020 JLMoran, AshleyDillo, Chadster and 4 others 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JLMoran Posted April 22, 2020 Report Share Posted April 22, 2020 2 hours ago, coneyraven said: Great, and now I have Screaming Jay Hawkins' "Constipation Blues" playing in my head. aaaaaAAAAHHHHHH!!! Let it go! Let it go! Let it GO! Let it GOOOOOOOOOO! Chadster, coneyraven and Ogilthorpe 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted May 2, 2020 Report Share Posted May 2, 2020 I had a dream last night that I saw a color that I had never seen before. When I woke up this morning, I realized it was just a figment of my imagination. Ogilthorpe 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeWhoWaits Posted May 4, 2020 Report Share Posted May 4, 2020 On 5/2/2020 at 3:09 PM, rjac said: I had a dream last night that I saw a color that I had never seen before. When I woke up this morning, I realized it was just a pigment of my imagination. FIFY Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1978bucketlist Posted May 4, 2020 Report Share Posted May 4, 2020 How does death Vader like his toast? On the dark side. Chadster, WAAAYTOOO and Ogilthorpe 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chadster Posted May 8, 2020 Report Share Posted May 8, 2020 WAAAYTOOO, RWDW1204, coneyraven and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coneyraven Posted May 8, 2020 Report Share Posted May 8, 2020 On 4/11/2020 at 5:01 PM, Chadster said: STEALING!!!! Thank You RWDW1204, JLMoran and WAAAYTOOO 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted May 8, 2020 Report Share Posted May 8, 2020 (edited) On 5/4/2020 at 1:23 PM, 1978bucketlist said: How does death Vader like his toast? On the dark side. Did you know Darth Vader had a sister? Her name was Ella........... and of course their relationship had its ups and downs...... Edited May 8, 2020 by rjac added new info RWDW1204, Chadster, WAAAYTOOO and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted May 13, 2020 Report Share Posted May 13, 2020 Wow, no one else with corny Jokes? Here's a real doozy What do you call a chicken who counts her eggs?............a mathmachicken. Neesa, WAAAYTOOO, Ogilthorpe and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1978bucketlist Posted May 14, 2020 Report Share Posted May 14, 2020 What did one traffic light say to other traffic light? Don’t look! I’m changing! JLMoran, Chadster, WAAAYTOOO and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted May 15, 2020 Report Share Posted May 15, 2020 A naked man walks into a costume party with his girlfriend on his back. He said "I.m a turtle". He was asked, "what's that on your back" to which he replied "that's Michelle". JLMoran, WAAAYTOOO, Chadster and 3 others 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chadster Posted May 17, 2020 Report Share Posted May 17, 2020 RWDW1204, JLMoran, WAAAYTOOO and 4 others 2 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chadster Posted May 23, 2020 Report Share Posted May 23, 2020 SpeedNoodles, JLMoran, Ogilthorpe and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mworkman Posted May 24, 2020 Report Share Posted May 24, 2020 JLMoran, Ogilthorpe, Neesa and 1 other 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted May 24, 2020 Report Share Posted May 24, 2020 Two men were sitting next to one another at Murphys Pub in London, and after awhile, one of the blokes turned to the other and said, “I can’t help but think, from listening to you, that you’re from Ireland.” “Yes, that I am!” the bloke responded, to which the first one replied, “So am I! And where about from Ireland might you be?” “Im from Dublin, I am,” the other bloke said, and the first one replied, “So am I!” “Mother Mary and begora,” the other bloke said. “And what street did you live on in Dublin?” “A lovely little area it was. I lived on McCleary Street in the old central part of town,” he replied, to which the first one said, “Faith and it’s a small world. So did I! So did I! And to what school would you have been going?” “Well now, I went to St. Marys, of course,” the other bloke said, with the first one replying, “And so did I. Tell me, what year did you graduate?” “Well, now, lets see. I graduated in 1964,” the other bloke said. “The Good Lord must be smiling down upon us!” the first bloke exclaimed. “I can hardly believe our good luck at winding up in the same place tonight. Can you believe it, I graduated from St. Marys in 1964 my own self!” At this point, a woman named Vicky came in and sat down at the bar. The bartender Brian walked over to her and said, “It’s going to be a long night tonight.” “Why do you say that, Brian?” Vicky asked. “The Murphy twins are drunk again.” Chadster, mworkman, WAAAYTOOO and 3 others 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted May 26, 2020 Report Share Posted May 26, 2020 mworkman, Chadster, WAAAYTOOO and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chadster Posted May 28, 2020 Report Share Posted May 28, 2020 RWDW1204, rjac, JLMoran and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mworkman Posted May 29, 2020 Report Share Posted May 29, 2020 If this is a savings, i need some of that stuff there smoking. WAAAYTOOO, Ogilthorpe, rjac and 1 other 2 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RCIfan1912 Posted May 29, 2020 Report Share Posted May 29, 2020 Just now, mworkman said: If this is a savings, i need some of that stuff there smoking. Yeah ok, that's a no for me. I'll stick to the free stuff in the island. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mworkman Posted May 29, 2020 Report Share Posted May 29, 2020 Just now, RCIfan1912 said: Yeah ok, that's a no for me. I'll stick to the free stuff in the island. But $800 dollars is $800 dollars, that's a saving! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ogilthorpe Posted May 29, 2020 Report Share Posted May 29, 2020 Where do sheep go on vacation? The Baaaa-Haaaa-maas coneyraven, RWDW1204, mworkman and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted June 8, 2020 Report Share Posted June 8, 2020 Ogilthorpe, mworkman, WAAAYTOOO and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JLMoran Posted June 8, 2020 Report Share Posted June 8, 2020 You know, this thread is called CORNy jokes. I have not seen one single joke about corn here in five whole pages! Allow me to fix that... WAAAYTOOO, Ogilthorpe, RWDW1204 and 3 others 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted June 9, 2020 Report Share Posted June 9, 2020 Ogilthorpe 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted June 24, 2020 Report Share Posted June 24, 2020 Did you know that there are no canaries in the Canary Islands? And the same thing applies to the Virgin Islands. There are no canaries there either! mathbees, JLMoran, Ogilthorpe and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted July 13, 2020 Report Share Posted July 13, 2020 So, I just got home for a week at he Outer Banks, Kill Devil Hills specifically. Left the laptop at home and I now find it hard to believe that you all are letting this thread wither away. What no comedian wanna be's? Ashamed of your jokes or has Matt put a muzzle on you? Well, not ME! A man was telling his neighbor, 'I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art. It's perfect.''Really,' answered the neighbor. 'What kind is it?' 'Twelve thirty.' Ogilthorpe, MrB, RWDW1204 and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FManke Posted July 13, 2020 Report Share Posted July 13, 2020 Why do raccoons eat out of trash cans? Because grocery stores are to hard to tip over. Ogilthorpe and WAAAYTOOO 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeWhoWaits Posted July 14, 2020 Report Share Posted July 14, 2020 Why can't Pinocchio's nose be twelve inches long? Because then it would be a foot. Ogilthorpe, RWDW1204 and WAAAYTOOO 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted July 16, 2020 Report Share Posted July 16, 2020 My wife hasn't ordered anything from Amazon.com in a while. So, yesterday the UPS driver knocked on our door to see if we're okay. WAAAYTOOO, Ogilthorpe, RWDW1204 and 1 other 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FManke Posted July 18, 2020 Report Share Posted July 18, 2020 What do you feed a panda on Halloween? Bam-Boooo! WAAAYTOOO, Ogilthorpe and JLMoran 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Tule Posted July 19, 2020 Report Share Posted July 19, 2020 Ogilthorpe, JLMoran, FManke and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Auto Posted July 22, 2020 Report Share Posted July 22, 2020 I can cut wood just by looking at it. It's true...I saw it with my own eyes. coneyraven, WAAAYTOOO and Ogilthorpe 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TempoGL Posted July 22, 2020 Report Share Posted July 22, 2020 Why did the single nurses change clothes after work and before going out for the evening? Because they "don't want no scrubs!" WAAAYTOOO 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted July 25, 2020 Report Share Posted July 25, 2020 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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