My Odyssey into Fat Pants: The Final Frontier. 11 nights. Star Class. NJ weather in January. Every girl’s dream. (1/5 – 1/16/25)

[MaryS]

57 minutes ago, SweetPea said:

Also, we're on our way to The Book. I'm sure you're all waiting with bated breath for THAT review ...

I didn't fall asleep during that one but I probably should have.  Good luck have a few drinks

[Lovetocruise2002]

Omg! The Book was so bad I actually wiped it from my memory and did not remember that OY had that production until reading this now! 

[asquared17]

these are the pictures i have from the book. 

if none of them make sense… i feel like that makes sense. that’s the whole point. 

 

hopefully @SweetPea can confirm if this tracks for her experience

[SweetPea]

2 hours ago, OCSC Mike said:

Never seen Karaoke in the pub before. Is that an Odyssey thing?

Let's hope so, because i literally died and went to hell 

[SweetPea]

2 hours ago, OCSC Mike said:

Never seen Karaoke in the pub before. Is that an Odyssey thing?

It WAS, in fact, a LIVING HELL

[asquared17]

can confirm. i was getting the play by play. 

at least she could soften it with booze from the friendly bartenders forced to endure it along with her and batman

[Jax]

3 hours ago, SweetPea said:

Also, we're on our way to The Book. I'm sure you're all waiting with bated breath for THAT review .....

I lasted as long as my popcorn did. 

[SweetPea]

I can't even. 

Listen, i get it. 

You have a favorite song you think you can sing, and you have the opportunity to do it.

The problem is, you're in a pub with regulars at this point of the cruise, and after 10pm, no one (and i do mean NO ONE) wants to hear in THIS particular venue

1) a 12 year old girl attempt to belt out Coldplay (key word: attempt)

2) a post-menopausal woman sing The Wind Beneath My Wings

3) A white hair vintage singing My Way. 

We saw our favorite bartender and asked: karaoke? HERE? He just said sorry, i know, like he didn't have a choice. We left. 

@asquared17 knows. I'm not exaggerating

#GITCC

[asquared17]

29 minutes ago, SweetPea said:

woman sing The Wind Beneath My Wings

i got the video of this and it cut off just before the high note. 

was it for the best? the worst? 

we don’t know

[SweetPea]

1 minute ago, asquared17 said:

i got the video of this and it cut off just before the high note. 

was it for the best? the worst? 

we don’t know

Thank you for backing me on this nightmare!

[asquared17]

30 minutes ago, SweetPea said:

3) A white hair vintage singing My Way. 

hot take: i would have actually liked to have seen this

 

but i tried to tell her that with the book and the effectors done, karaoke is really the only game in town on odyssey.

no aqua show or melodies in the (central) park with jed!!!

[SweetPea]

1 minute ago, asquared17 said:

hot take: i would have actually liked to have seen this

 

but i tried to tell her that with the book and the effectors done, karaoke is really the only game in town on odyssey.

no aqua show or melodies in the (central) park with jed!!!

Truth!

[Pooch]

Ok, full disclosure, I sing, like with a symphony level singing and am something of a snob about singing.  Started when I was 5.  I don’t understand karaoke.  Went on Harmony once and this person’s voice was an offense to God’s ear!  If you CANNOT SING, why would you want to show that off???   Why would anyone want to endure hearing it???!  

[OCSC Mike]

14 minutes ago, Pooch said:

 If you CANNOT SING, why would you want to show that off???   Why would anyone want to endure hearing it???!

It's funny, we are definitely NOT karaoke people and we're also not "sit at the bar listening to music" people either. Given that our current M.O. is to sail the same ship several times in a row out of convenience, this leaves us looking for stuff to do at night. By our 3rd and 4th time on Wonder, we were only seeing the ice show (b/c we love it) and adult comedy b/c it obviously always changes. We tried hanging out in Music Hall but didn't love the band/music. So we wound up going to karaoke a few times.... and I reached the same conclusion. I expected to watch people having fun while not being great singers... but most of them were painful to listen to and I wound up asking myself the same question.

[SweetPea]

Ok re: Stage 5 Clinger drama.

You know we met that odd couple on embarkation day at Playmakers? The ones who had Batman as Russell Crowe and me as Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally? Both comparisons obviously #BSC. We saw them again at Chops the first night?

Not since. 

We'd prefer them at this point.

I honestly don't want to sound ridic, but ....

I'll just say we're dealing with a mildly uncomfortable sitch we'd prefer to avoid. I get the impression they may be upside-down people (maybe don't tell my husband to give your wife a hug? Maybe, IDK, don't give me an uncomfortable side hug and plant a hard kiss on my cheek?).

Maybe it's nothing, but when Batman gets a Spidey sense something seems off . 

 

[OCSC Mike]

24 minutes ago, SweetPea said:

I'll just say we're dealing with a mildly uncomfortable sitch we'd prefer to avoid. I get the impression they may be upside-down people (maybe don't tell my husband to give your wife a hug? Maybe, IDK, don't give me an uncomfortable side hug and plant a hard kiss on my cheek?).

Congrats on stumbling into @Ampurp85-esque shenanigans. Hope you're able to avoid them going forward.

I'm still trying to figure out why we never run into any of the stuff I read about here. I've mentioned being an introvert but my wife isn't and we do chat with people during cruises... but the worst I've come across were just people I found annoying. Most of our interactions wind up with pleasant small talk. My best guess is that we don't go near the casino and don't stay out late or hang out at bars much. Maybe the shenanigan-people don't hang out where we do... Solarium, trivia, game shows, etc. Maybe it's b/c we almost always sail during school holidays so there are more families/kids onboard.

[Pooch]

Ok love anything called Bastard’s!  Isn’t there also a Blue Bitch bar there?  Is it walkable from the pier?  Hubby & I are walkers or at least we try to be & definitely walked to the beach last time in St Maarten.   15/20 minutes is close & doable for us?

[SweetPea]

For the past 2 nights, we've been in CK.

Two nights ago, there was a man who looked like the husband of the Tram Trespassers couple from Oasis. Now a lot of white-haired balding, medium-built guys with glasses can be pretty nondescript, so we were trying to figure out if it was him.

His wife was not well and had dinner in their room so, without her, we were struggling. 

If you recall, we did get a pic of them in CK with us on Oasis and if only you could've seen us 1) trying to find that Pic 2) finding it and then trying to analyze similarities, noting that we could really use some facial recognition software 3) moving on to this Pic

 

Because Batman insisted it is Natalie Portman, and i argued it wasn't, which led to google imaging Natalie Portman's lips. After a spirited debate, i think we settled on it not being Natalie Portman. 

These were food pics from the first night. Batman is really tiring of food porn pics so you can guess what is happening when i try to take them after this night. 

I love the bread dipping spreads at CK.

The French onion soup was amazing but the cheese was so thick, i had to stop. When you need a knife to eat soup, maybe don't eat that soup. 

Batman's go to

 

Batman said he could cut his chicken with a fork. 

The lamb loin was excellent. But I've never understood mint jelly with lamb. And yes, i stole Batman's asparagus. He offered me his broccoli too.

 

The following night, we took no food pics. However, we saw the suspect Tram husband again. But this time, his wife was there. Frustratingly, from where we were both seated, we could not see her. She was the deciding factor! But then Batman realized he could faintly see her reflection in the window from where he was seated. This again involved us pulling up that picture and Batman doing another stare and compare, saying he wasn't sure but didn't think that was her. Try harder, i said! I finally couldn't take it anymore, and got up to see if i could get in a position to see. Definitely not her, but Batman offered his opinion that maybe Tram husband got remarried. 

Why are you even READING this? Like seriously, what if it WERE the Tram Trespassing couple after all? The outcome wouldn't change. 

 

[SweetPea]

27 minutes ago, OCSC Mike said:

I'm still trying to figure out why we never run into any of the stuff I read about here.

This is directly related to your meager/suboptimal D+ voucher use. Clearly.

[CravingaCruise]

1 hour ago, Pooch said:

 If you CANNOT SING, why would you want to show that off???   Why would anyone want to endure hearing it???!  

EXACTLY!  My hubby for years has tried to get me to do a duet with him of some sort because he thinks it would be fun. He loves to sing and so do I but we both sound like cats being tortured. I’m sure nobody wants to endure that nonsense!  
 

We had our girls over one night and after several drinks decided it would be fun to do (at home). One daughter recorded our attempt at singing and still holds it ransom with the threat to post it to get her way. Hubby thought it was great. He has to be tone deaf. 

[WAAAYTOOO]

22 minutes ago, SweetPea said:

 

OMG the olive tapenade !  I could eat that stuff with a spoon.  SOOOO good on the little bread sticks.  The rest of those spreads are nasty....but ummmmmm for the olive tapenade.

[SweetPea]

5 hours ago, WAAAYTOOO said:

OMG the olive tapenade !  I could eat that stuff with a spoon.  

Funny you should say that. And I'll leave it at that. 

[SweetPea]

 

I had been waiting on a response to my PhD comment. Sounds about right. 

[SweetPea]

I have actual notes on The Book, but cannot do it justice ATM, if YWIM.

I'll just say in my notes, i confused Ethel Murman with Esther Williams in my frantic analysis and leave you with that for now. 

[SweetPea]

40 minutes ago, Pooch said:

Ok love anything called Bastard’s!  Isn’t there also a Blue Bitch bar there?  Is it walkable from the pier?  Hubby & I are walkers or at least we try to be & definitely walked to the beach last time in St Maarten.   15/20 minutes is close & doable for us?

Yes! Blue Bitch is after Holland House (Big Bastards is before) from the Water Taxi. 

I'm sorry, i do think you can walk, but if you take the Water Taxi, it's literally RIGHT there. I hope you get to try it!

[OCSC Mike]

39 minutes ago, SweetPea said:

This is directly related to your meager/suboptimal D+ voucher use. Clearly.

I dunno about meager but suboptimal is fair. That said, that ain't it unless you're saying I need to use like 5 in an hour while sitting at a bar at night... which isn't happening, lol. If I get to using the 8 or so I wind up with per day it's spread out throughout the day/night and some of the drinks are definitely not strong, they just taste good (like the Mississippi Moonlight from Mason Jar).

[Pooch]

13 minutes ago, SweetPea said:

Yes! Blue Bitch is after Holland House (Big Bastards is before) from the Water Taxi. 

I'm sorry, i do think you can walk, but if you take the Water Taxi, it's literally RIGHT there. I hope you get to try it!

So past Blue Bitch and Holland House coming from the ship correct?

[SweetPea]

14 minutes ago, Pooch said:

So past Blue Bitch and Holland House coming from the ship correct?

I think if you walked, yes, you'd be coming from the other direction. @asquared17, you and J walk to HH, right?

I mean their sections on the beach are all right in a row, so it's only NuLove which should be No Love that separates HH from Big Bs.

[SweetPea]

We are waiting on our Rum tasting tour in Antigua. Batman is on the balcony. I'm upstairs putting on sunscreen when this happens 

 

Since he came inside and threw the coozy upstairs to me while never leaving the downstairs, I'm guessing the answer is yes. 

 

[asquared17]

1 hour ago, SweetPea said:

I think if you walked, yes, you'd be coming from the other direction. @asquared17, you and J walk to HH, right?

i think @Pooch would be okay to walk in full from the ship — sans water taxi — bc they’ve done it in the past. and yes, should be coming from the opposite end of the street. i’m not sure where it spits you out bc i think you have some highway walking, maybe??

 

we take the water taxi because it’s relatively inexpensive and i like the short walk from the water taxi drop off to the HH. 

for what it’s worth, as some one who is prone to motion sickness, the water taxi is fine for me. 

[lovetheplaya]

2 hours ago, SweetPea said:

 

Why are you even READING this? Like seriously, what if it WERE the Tram Trespassing couple after all? The outcome wouldn't change. 

 

I LAUGHED so hard at this...so hilarious. 

[asquared17]

1 hour ago, SweetPea said:

 

I had been waiting on a response to my PhD comment. Sounds about right. 

i love how batman just gives up the ghost and changes the subject when he’s done

[SweetPea]

We are back from our tour, which was only maybe 2 hours or so. Which is fine for us because we've been to Antigua several times and honestly it's not my fave. If it's your first visit to Antigua, maybe try the lobster lunch catamaran instead to see more of the island and its beaches. We've done that before and it's not bad. Not Great. Just better for a first time visitor.

Our tour was informative. You got a history and cultural lesson, primarily, i think, to give them time to prepare lunch. 

Honestly, i didn't read the reviews. I saw an excursion after 12 noon with Rum. Say no more. I didn't know we were getting lunch and i asked Rafa if i could have BLTs waiting for us after our tour since i figured i would be doing a Rum tasting on an empty stomach.  Again, my ADHD got the better of me. 

Allow me to regale you with pics of Antigua currency, #FunWithFlags, other stuff i took pics of because i didn't feel like reading the info at the time. 

The rum tasting was like every other Rum tasting I've been to, with the exception of Goslings, which is the gold standard. Start you off with a healthy pour of rum punch, a smaller shot of 2 year old rum, a tiny shot of 5 year old rum. Whatevs. I don't even really like rum because if I'm going to drink a 15 year old rum, i might as well drink a bourbon. Two of my former coworkers are both named Leon and both are from Guyana where El Dorado is king. Love them both and on occasion they'd bring me back El Dorado 15 year old rum when they'd visit home. Once i helped one Leon with something and he brought me back 25 yo El Dorado as a thanks. I was always so touched by that, so really, rum has a sentimental value to me. This rum tasting was fine for amateurs. Was it worth $80 pp?  Questionable.

There was a funny sign at the bar which i failed to capture a pic. 

It said

If you need credit, go to Helen Wait.

We heard more than once that  whether you pronounce it as An-ti-ga (English) or An-ti-gwa (Spanish) they don't care. It was said more than once. That's why i remember it. I got lost on the flag meaning so THANK GOD i was handed the flyer.

Really, i was more interested in bad toupee guy who was also on the rour, and i spent more time wondering if he takes it off at night to sleep and how often he washes it. 

 

 

 

 

[Pooch]

3 hours ago, asquared17 said:

i think @Pooch would be okay to walk in full from the ship — sans water taxi — bc they’ve done it in the past. and yes, should be coming from the opposite end of the street. i’m not sure where it spits you out bc i think you have some highway walking, maybe??

 

we take the water taxi because it’s relatively inexpensive and i like the short walk from the water taxi drop off to the HH. 

for what it’s worth, as some one who is prone to motion sickness, the water taxi is fine for me. 

There was a highway there??  Must have been drunker than I thought!

[OCSC Mike]

13 minutes ago, SweetPea said:

#FunWithFlags

This?

[SweetPea]

See, i knew someone would know that reference! WTG, @OCSC Mike

This Pic doesn't capture how pretty my view is right now.  I thought I'd sneak a catnap (i never nap)

 

But the Beyond is pulling out now and this is the view from bed. 

 

[OCSC Mike]

1 minute ago, SweetPea said:

See, i knew someone would know that reference!

You don't want to know how many times I've seen pretty much every episode, lol. In fact, there's a rerun on in the background as I'm typing this.

[Lovetocruise2002]

7 hours ago, OCSC Mike said:

I'm still trying to figure out why we never run into any of the stuff I read about here. I've mentioned being an introvert but my wife isn't and we do chat with people during cruises... but the worst I've come across were just people I found annoying. Most of our interactions wind up with pleasant small talk. My best guess is that we don't go near the casino and don't stay out late or hang out at bars much. Maybe the shenanigan-people don't hang out where we do... Solarium, trivia, game shows, etc. Maybe it's b/c we almost always sail during school holidays so there are more families/kids onboard.

+1 on all of this! Thank goodness! lol

Although I do bring on air travel shenanigans so not sure what is worse.

[SweetPea]

I'm exhausted and iDK what we're doing tonight so let me do a photodump of the bridge tour and then MAYBE think about a shower. Maybe. 

This is our free-for-all night with no dinner plans, which i was convinced would buy me wife points. Batman told me not to pat myself on the back because it's 1 night out of 11,  and my % wasn't looking good. He said that my numbers suck, even in baseball.

Captain Merak, as mentioned, does the bridge tour himself. 

I asked him about Pilots. They are required by the port, but he is still responsible for operations. In the Caribbean, they board and go to their own station. I asked which station is that? He pointed to the coffee station.

He said the pilots in Alaska are among the best, and provide all sorts of helpful info like windspeed, wildlife activity, etc. We also talked about Panama Canal crossings, and the pilot pretty much lines up the ship to get it started in the locks, which they traverse with about a foot's clearance on either side and then they immediately hand the controls back to the Captain. But, he also said that Odyssey doesn't do very many PC crossings.

 

 

[SweetPea]

I really did love this tour. Captain is smart, funny, and engaging. I wrote him a Thank You note because we've never had a Captain take the time to do one before, and it meant a lot to us. I asked Rafa if that was weird. He assured me it wasn't, but, he could've thrown the note away for all i know. Batman and i were in Network Operations and spent the last 25-26 years performing surveillance and ensuring contiuity of services when errant alarms surfaced. Not the same, but close enough. 

He also took the time to take pics with everyone, but Batman has those. 

 

Great guy.