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  1. Is our White Whale of Moby Dick proportions? IDK .. are you counting our financial well-being? Who cares! YOLO!! Who: SweetPea and Batman, two crazy mutual enablers who found about 23 (24, 25?) years ago. Married for most of those. Don't ask me our anniversary. I once proudly told Batman my new ATM PIN, proclaiming, "Get it?! It's our anniversary backwards!" Spoiler: it wasn't. I've not heard the end of it since. What: Our White Whale. Why, you ask? We had 3,462.7 cruises in the Owner's Panoramic canceled during the Covid. Seriously. By March 578th, 2020, I'd had enough, just like the rest of the world. This was bound to happen sooner or later. I made sure of it. When: September 24-October 1, 2023. Too short and will be over too quick, but the ship is our destination so who cares?! (Our itinerary is mundane and boring. We'll only be getting off the ship for PDCC.) Where: Oasis of the Seas (C'mon now. There are only 2 OPs in the entire fleet, so there's a very good chance you'd win that coin toss.) Why: Why not?!! Besides, flying sucks and we can drive to the port! And by drive, i mean be driven. Because who drives on vacation? Is that even a thing?! How: Selling one pickled middle-aged kidney on the dark web. Let's face it, there's a difference between a kidney from a 20-year old athlete and one from a 50-something whose kidney is going to be (a-hem) grape-flavored. Clearly what I'm trying to say is that you could probably book two Star Class rooms with the 20-year-old kidney. Our cost wasn't *that* bad, but should still leave you questioning whether you'd consider us sound financial advisors. Crown&Anchor Level: Brown. I briefly considered making a parody pin that said "Not Pinnacle" with the "not" in very, very small font. I think it'd have been an excellent conversation starter. Pre-cruise Diet: Poor. I planned to lose 30 pounds. I only have 33 to go. Forget that noise. So here we go on our 3.5-year-in-the-making adventure. If you know us, I'm taking a very liberal definition of the term "adventure" here. As in, you shouldn't expect FlowRider reviews from us. That would only happen if they privacy-tented the entire wave pool and literally no one else could see us. I've seen this new TikTok thing all the cool kids are talking about, and going viral for all the wrong reasons would send me into a Brendan Fraser Whale-spin without the need of a fat suit. (Perhaps i should tell you about the time i managed to ATV my way into the middle of a sugar cane field in St. Kitts where the excursion leader pulled me aside and quietly asked if I'd consider a private lesson before allowing the group to continue. That was 20 years and 30 pounds ago and my grace and agility has not aged like the fine wine I enjoy so much. --- That was for the kids in the back who didn't get my grape- flavored kidney joke earlier.) This is our first cruise post-shutdown. We wanted to feel like we were going on vacation, not checking in for a clinical procedure. So we sat out all mandates. We both found them too stressful and opted to wait until the craziness was well on its way to over before we even remotely considered cruising again. This is one of the reasons we're going to the poorhouse post-cruise. I booked this pretty late and didn't partake in opening day prices. However, i got worried this was Oasis's last season in NJ so i bit the bullet and made several payments Batman wouldn't notice so our final bill was more in line with what I thought he could stomach. I can't be the only benevolently devious spouse to do so. If you've done something like this yourself, blink twice. (And, Mindy, if you're reading: You're a SAINT!) For the record, i caught Batman in a good mood one night and asked him the max he'd pay for a week-long cruise in Star Class. Unsurprisingly, it was a *bit* less than the cost of this one. So this is just between us RC Blog family, right? Good thing he thinks this website is Royal.blog.Carribean.me.live.com/reports which he always forgets to find later .... And to any dudes reading, please remember: there is no such idiom as "Bros before blogs." That does not and will never exist.... if i can help it. So, as long as Batman never does find this blog ... Continue to follow along to learn the riveting answers to such burning questions as: how will Anthem Star Class compare to Oasis Star Class? Will we prefer O Class to Q Class in general? Is this Deck 17 we keep reading about an actual Nirvana? What else has the pandemic stolen from us in pre v post shutdown changes? Will we ever want to return to Norwegian Haven? And ultimately, will selling a functioning kidney be worth the experience? Come with us! We'll find out together!
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