12thman Posted May 9, 2021 Report Share Posted May 9, 2021 Found this thought I’d share. Spring break A group of college kids went on a booze cruise for spring break. The ship sank and the young men escaped in a small lifeboat. They floated for several days but nobody came to rescue them. Eventually, delirious from a lack of fluid, one of the men noticed a bottle floating in the water. He reached over and picked it out. Suddenly, a genie emerged from the bottle with a loud whoosh. “I am a genie and I can grant you one wish!” said the genie. “That’s a no-brainer!” The frat boy said. “I wish the ocean were made of beer!” The genie immediately granted the wish and then vanished, “You idiot!” said the second kid. “Now we have to pee in the boat!” PRebecca, Neesa, RWDW1204 and 8 others 1 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeWhoWaits Posted September 24, 2021 Report Share Posted September 24, 2021 AlmondFarmer, WAAAYTOOO, cruisellama and 5 others 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WAAAYTOOO Posted September 24, 2021 Report Share Posted September 24, 2021 ahhhhh....took me a while to get this one. ..."spilled the beans"... Ogilthorpe, Neesa, cdixon22 and 1 other 2 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruisellama Posted September 26, 2021 Report Share Posted September 26, 2021 My grandfather was an old nautical engineer who tried to warn everyone on the Titanic that they were doomed First he yelled at the passengers while they boarded...he was ignored Then he yelled at the Captain and the First Mate...he was ignored Then as he continued to yell his warnings; people began to tell him to be quiet and that he was crazy Eventually, after all his yelling; Security came and escorted him out of the movie theater rjac, WAAAYTOOO, SPS and 5 others 7 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruisellama Posted September 26, 2021 Report Share Posted September 26, 2021 A Sea Captain looks through his telescope and sees ships approaching on the horizon. He says to his first mate "Arrrr Matey, fetch me me red shirt". "But why, Captain?" the Mate says. "If these be enemies and we must defend our ship I don't want me men to see me bleed". The mate fetches the shirt as the Captain looks out again, this time seeing a fleet of Pirate Ships gaining on them. He turns to the first mate again: "Arrr Matey, fetch me me brown pants". SuperStarian, Neesa, cdixon22 and 5 others 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cdixon22 Posted September 27, 2021 Report Share Posted September 27, 2021 If you are paying $5 for a bottle of smart water, it is not working. LovetoCruise87, rjac, cruisellama and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted September 27, 2021 Report Share Posted September 27, 2021 1 hour ago, cdixon22 said: If you are paying $5 for a bottle of smart water, it is not working. Au contraire mon ami, the manufacturers think this is VERY smart for their bottom line. I, myself, am happy with the dumb ass stuff out of the faucet. Ogilthorpe, cruisellama, LovetoCruise87 and 2 others 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruisellama Posted September 28, 2021 Report Share Posted September 28, 2021 ME: Alexa, remind me to go to the gym. ALEXA: I have added Gin to your shopping list ME: Close enough HeWhoWaits, RWDW1204, LovetoCruise87 and 2 others 4 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LovetoCruise87 Posted September 30, 2021 Report Share Posted September 30, 2021 You may have already asked Siri this on your phone, but I think it is hilarious: Siri, what is 0 divided by 0? Imagine that you have 0 cookies and you split them evenly among 0 friends. How many cookies does each person get? See? It doesn’t make sense. And Cookie Monster is sad that there are no cookies, and you are sad that you have no friends RWDW1204, cruisellama, WAAAYTOOO and 1 other 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cdixon22 Posted October 1, 2021 Report Share Posted October 1, 2021 What country of origin are most fish from? Finland Ogilthorpe, rjac, cruisellama and 2 others 1 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjac Posted October 9, 2021 Report Share Posted October 9, 2021 cruisellama, cdixon22, Ogilthorpe and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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